20 Mar Why You Need to Be Obsessed with the Oxford Comma

Proper grammar and punctuation are not just for copywriters and other wordnerds – getting them right can save you face and big bucks in business.

Written by Daniela Cavalletti

4 min read

You might think us writers, we’re gentle folk. Quietly shaping words into sentences, carefully assembling them into pleasing paragraphs, and lovingly creating stories. All while sipping a cuppa in a comfortable, relaxing writer’s cave.

Well, that happens … sometimes. Often, if you’re lucky. But apart from the angst about writer’s block and looming deadlines, we also have a fierce side about us.

We can turn into bold fighters-for-a-cause when we disagree about how to use language and grammar. I know, right? Who would have thunk it.

A writer’s obsession with all things language and linguistics can divide us word-nerds into opposing camps far worse than science-fiction obsessed ‘Trekkies’ facing off ‘Warsies’ and other space-nerds. They have nothing on a writer fixated on their particular bugbear.

And so, here is mine.

An Ode to the Oxford Comma

I tend to get on my particular soapbox – a tiny, tiny thing ­– more than one would think possible. It’s the size of mere fly-droppings, really.

Meet the Oxford comma.

The Oxford what? Yup, the wonderful, underrated Oxford or serial comma. I’m obsessed with a punctuation mark, one I’d defend to my last, if not breath, then at least writing day. Perhaps I do need to get out more … but hear me out.

The One About the Sex-Worker Professor Panels

So, the serial or Oxford comma is the comma you put before an ‘and’ or ‘or’ in a list of at least three things. The Oxford comma ensures that it’s exactly clear what you mean.

Leaving it out can cause a lot of confusion!

I once saw a brochure – for a local education conference a teacher friend of mine had attended –advertising a discussion on sexual health by “a panel of our professors, a doctor and a former sex worker”.

According to my friend this was one of the best-attended sessions of the whole conference. Because it had left many expecting to hear some juicy details about one of the two cardigan-wearing professors in their 60s … revealing their far racier former lives.

Alas, it was a panel of four people: two professors, a doctor, and a former sex-worker. See what the Oxford comma did there?

It could have saved a lot of gossip-seeking education staff a big disappointment.

The Oxford Comma’s $5 Million Win in Court

Here’s another one … You might have heard of a recent lawsuit where the entire case hinged on the lack of our friend, the Oxford comma.

This case was like a thriller for comma connoisseurs!

The New York Times, like about every other newspaper in the world, reported on this case, and “the dreaded—or totally necessary—Oxford comma, perhaps the most polarizing of punctuation marks.” Don’t I know it.

Essentially, a missing Oxford comma in a relevant law was set to cost a company up to $10 million in an overtime dispute. Three truck drivers sued Oakhurst Dairy, seeking unpaid overtime pay. Maine state law regulates this pay, but it carves out some exemptions. It says overtime rules do not apply to:

The canning, processing, preserving, freezing, drying, marketing, storing, packing for shipment or distribution of:

(1) Agricultural produce;

(2) Meat and fish products; and

(3) Perishable foods.

So … did the law mean to exempt the distribution of the three categories 1-3? Or did it actually mean to exempt the act of packing for the shipping or distribution of the three categories? This case of a missing-in-action Oxford comma enthralled us punctuation purists and grammar groupies no end.

Forward a few years (and many hours in court and lawyer-hours billed later) and … the Oxford comma defenders won this round. Oakhurst Dairy recently settled the overtime dispute with its drivers that hinged entirely on the lack of an Oxford comma in state law and agreed to pay a hefty $5 million to the drivers.

Huzzah!

The Oxford Comma Means Business

There are many more amusing cases where the Oxford comma could have saved someone’s bacon or dignity. But as the legal case has shown us – the Oxford comma also means real business.

In business, you’ll be judged by what you communicate to your clients, prospects, readers, peers, and even your competitors. Whether it’s in your marketing, a tender, a sales pitch, on your website, or your social media profiles.

Clarity is key – but you don’t want to bore your readers to tears either.

But … Don’t Kill Your Prose with the Oxford Comma

Now, while I’m a staunch defender and life-long super-fan of the Oxford comma, I’ll try to use it where utterly necessary only. Be it for clarity or consistency of style. You never want to use seem to use punctuation marks just to impress someone with your ‘superior’ knowledge. Or make your prose bulky and cumbersome.

For your own writing, simply try and read out an ambiguous sentence that lists more than two items. Pause after each comma only – and see whether the correct meaning is conveyed.

It might save you face, … and a buck or $5 million of them.